Why Sherlock Holmes will not be successful in India?

**Disclaimer: This post is meant only for humor and not intended to defame anyone or anything. This blog post is as fictional as Mr. Holmes himself. Just relax and enjoy the post.**

Sherlock Holmes. He is known for his sound logic, reasoning and deduction. He is a consulting detective living in 221B, Baker Street, London, England. Though he is a fictional character, there is museum dedicated to him in actual 221B, Baker Street in London. Such is the popularity he gained from his adventures documented by Sir Arthur Conan Doyle.

After seeing the latest episode of the TV-series based on modern edition: “Sherlock – The Abominable Bride”, an idea struck me immediately. We have Byomkesh Bakshi, the Indian Avatar of Sherlock Holmes. But:

What would happen if Sherlock Holmes took a case in India?

Below is my humor-filled attempt to answer the above question. There would be several factors to consider, which are listed as below:

  1. Sweat

This would be one of the critical challenges that Sherlock will have to tackle in India. I mean he wears a suit and a travelling cloak and a hat all the times. He would be sweating buckets and I wouldn’t be too surprised if he had to be hospitalized due to excessive dehydration! I mean India is not the country of suits and boots. It is the land of lungi, dhoti and pajamas and chappals and sandals. And believe me or not, it is very hard to concentrate when you are drowning in your own sweat. For all we know, Dr. Watson might be busy to make him drink water on regular intervals than take notes of what is happening.

2. Different details and deductions

Holmes always required details, as minute as they can be. He claims that it is the smaller details which help in solving the case. Let us imagine that a murder has been committed and witness saw a man stabbing someone just a few meters ahead of him (obvious truth in the case) and Sherlock and Dr. Watson are called for investigation. As usual, Sherlock interviews the prime witness and he tells him a blunt description. Sherlock routinely asks for anything peculiar happened before or after stabbing. Witness replies: “Yes, Just before the stabbing there were some small pop sounds and a rotten smell coming out from the victim.” Sherlock’s eyes glowed with a possible mystery related to triggered poisoning, sensing which, Dr. Watson plainly said: “Calm down, Holmes, it was a fart. Just a fart.” 😉 😀

3. Gossip and clouded information

Another issue Sherlock would be tackling is: bragging and gossiping. Let us say there was a kidnapping in a certain village. Sherlock Holmes and Dr. Watson were invited to investigate. Now villagers are always closely connected to each other. They had information (gossip) about every member of their community. For someone like Sherlock Holmes, it should be only a matter of time to extract useful clues from such well informed sources around him. But here is the twist! A few interview dialogues as noted by Dr. Watson would go on like this: “So when did you last see the victim?” “Hain! O.o “ “Arey Chacha, akhri baar launde ko kab dekhe rhe?”….“Umm, humar bagal ke gaon wala tau ji nahi hai kya….wahi jo lambi dakar ke liye poore gaon me jaane jate hai….haan wahi…wo yaha humare gaon me aaye rhe…apni beti Champa…..haan wahi….jo gana bahut hi acha gaati hai…ek dum koyal ki tarah….haan..to wo Champa ka rishta leke aaye rhe yaha…or puch rahe the koi layak launda hai ya nahi. Hum issi sadak se jaa rahe the…apne padosi ki mausi ki bitiya…wahi jiske aadmi ka bada sa khet hai gaon ke bahar…. haan..to ussi ke bete ko dekhne. To jaise hi hum gali me mudde to hum kya dekhte hai………. (long dramatic pause)” “Tumne ladke ko dekha udhar?”….”Arey nahi nahi bhai, bata rahe hai na…. rukiye to thoda…kahi bhaga thodi na jaa raha hai! AREY O CHOTU KI MAA, jara chai to bhijwana 3 cup! Sath me biscuit bhi, bade sahab aaye hai! Haan…to jaise hi to gali me mudde…dekhte kya hai ki…wo tailor master ka ladka…..haan wahi…jo kal parso aam ke bagiche me bhi pakda gaya tha….wahi wahi….wo ek bhensiya ko pathar maar raha tha. Humko bahut hi bura laga….jaam ke dutkar lagaye….to ek dum hawa hua udhar se. Fir jaise hi padosi ki mausi ki bade khet wali beti ke ghar me ghus rahe the apan bagal ke gaon wala dakar chacha ke sath unki beti ka rishta liye to …….piche se ek “ladka” namaste karta hua gaya. Shayad wahi tha…shakal to thik se dekh nahi paaye. Badi hi jaldi me the bhaiya <Spits gutkha near by>” Sherlock fainted!

4. Political Pressure

Sherlock might have to face political pressure too when some high-profile suspect is involved. Let us assume that Sherlock was called to investigate the scam by some politician. The politician came to know about it and called him for a meeting. Sherlock, habitual to meet intelligent criminals like Moriarty, went to the politician with similar expectations. A man of habits, he arrived on time and then waited for 2 long hours for the politician to show up. Sherlock opened his mouth to make a statement of observations he had made in that little time about him and just then politician said: “Ama, bakwaas to kijiyega nahi! Hum jaante hai hum kon and aur ye bhi ki aap kaun hai! Sherlock Holmes and Dr. Watson, ek hi request hai aap se ki ye scam me jyada khusar-pusar karne ki jarurat to hai nahi! Jitna investigation karna tha wo humari banai hui “Investigation Team” kar li hai aur report bhi de di hai! Uske left-right me thodi si bhi budbud kiye na public me…to kaha hawa hoke…kidhar prakat hoge…..ye tumhari amma bhi nahi jaan payegi! To apni keemat boliye or mamle ko yahi rafa-dafa kar dijiye….nahi to ye scam ki money ki tarah aapko bhi gayab kar denge…keh de rahe hai abhi se. -_- ” <Holmes jumped from a building>

And that is how, I am afraid, that the chronicles of Sherlock Holmes would conclude in India! 

PS: Sorry for a long post. 

Mae Alssalama (Good Bye in Arabic) 🙂


The Test

Khamma-Ghani! (Hello in Marwadi)

I was walking in the college corridor going for a test. It was very different from the conventional academic tests. It was entrance test for English Press Recruitment. The walk to test-room was kind of filled with deja-vu. In my first year, I had failed to capitalize couple of opportunities merely because I didn’t bother trying. This happened during school days too. But today was different. Even though the fear of failure and not being competent enough was there just as it was in the good old times, there was something different this time. 

I did not slow down or took a wrong turn and went back to the room. Though I did feel gut wrenching nervousness. Yes, there was that feeling, but apart from that every brain cell was signalling me the same thing: Just Try. I propelled myself into the room and poof! The feeling of failure was gone and determination to do well emerged from within . In a way I had to overwhelm myself to sit in that hall and take the test. I collected the answer sheet, looked for a suitable place, and patiently waited for the test to start.  

“I won’t leave the room until I have tried my best” was the only thing I kept in my mind. Nothing else. Anything else didn’t matter much. “I might fail….So what, at least you will learn about the kind of questions that will be asked.” “People might think I am a loser, if I won’t get selected.” “They will mock me for even trying…..saying: I wasn’t worth it.” …… “Well, we don’t know what would happen after the test, but I would definitely be a loser if I don’t give it a try.” “I will keep my hand on face, so that very few people or none at all recognize me.” …… “Why? ‘Win Like a Man, Lose like a Man’ So sit!” 

With all these thoughts circling within my mind, the test began. First question appeared on black board and I was clueless about it. For a second I decided to handover the blank answer sheet and head out. “I mean….I wasn’t meant for it.” What is the point of this all! I won’t get selected anyway. But then second question appeared and it appeared solvable and with a little effort I was able to write something for it, which I thought will be suitable. I thanked myself for not leaving! Then I returned to question 1, and wrote something for it too!

Whether I would get selected or not is a different story. I probably might not get selected or I might be the first choice of selectors, both are equally probable. The lesson I learnt from here was: Try and Something will definitely happen which would be better than nothing. In a different scenario, I might have left the room immediately after reaching and would have missed on writing a humorous post on our Registration Procedure (one of the questions in the test). 😉 I might or might not have written what evaluating person desired for, but it was fun writing that composition for almost 40 mins and then spending next 20 on that difficult question. 

In life I think it is important to realize that there will be limited number of opportunities. To grab a few, more often than not, you will have to step out of your comfort zone. There is no point in hesitating! May be something miraculous will happen to you! Opportunity costs are mandatory.  We should try even though we might feel negative about it inside. Failure, after all, is just another stepping stone to success. And then there is this great saying:

If you succeed, you can lead.
If you fail, you should guide.

Ghani-Ghani-Khamma (Reply to Khamma Ghani) 😀

First Semester in BITS-Pilani, Pilani

Similar to a previously published article on my first month at BITS Pilani, this one will be focusing on my experiences which I have accumulated during first 4 months (1st semester). Right from registration formalities to saying “Hey” for the first time, from attending crazy late night parties in All Night Canteen to demanding treats for no good reason from each other, I grew up 1 semester old! So without any further delay, lets dive into this:

1. The Campus:


Beautiful, isn’t it! When I first entered the campus through a big gate with a board greeting welcome, it felt like entering into an entirely different world. It is rightfully said the BITS Campus is a “town established within a village”. The aura/atmosphere is complete different inside and outside campus gates. Starting from the main gate to even most remote area in campus, I could find dense green trees on both sides of roads. I never found it very difficult to find my way around the campus.

Campus is divided in several academic blocks called “Faculty Division” or FD(s). During first few days finding rooms in these buildings was like finding hidden treasures. If you are come across another lost being like you, the connection of friendship was almost instant. There are 13 hostels spread around New Academic Block (NAB), with only one girl’s hostel (Meera Bhawan) being farthest from the academic blocks. Central Auditorium sits below the mighty clock tower (as seen in photo) with Rotunda and NAB in front. Within my first week, I visited Sky Lawns, Birla Museum, Aditya Birla & G.D. Birla Memorials, Student Activities Centre, Food King, The Saraswati Temple, Akshay Supermart,  Shiv Ganga, C’not (market place inside campus), Med-C Grounds, Staff Quarters, Gym-Ground, VFast Hostel and Placement Office.

Classrooms are well-lit and are same as they were back in 1960s, with little changes like inclusion of Computers for presentation purposes. Renovation of entire campus is going on under an extensive and well planned project. Campus has synthetic courts for basketball, tennis, cricket field, indoor badminton, chess, Table Tennis, Gym, pool table in Student Activities Center. First week here was like exploring Hogwarts with friends and finding new secret corridors or places every now and then!

2. The BITSians:

Any new place is as good as people habituating in it. Same goes for BITS-Pilani. I encountered all kinds of personalities. I met students ranging from nerds to optimised ones, quite sophisticated to most barbarian ones, most hygienic to care free ones, from aloof ones to highly social ones, addicts to fanatics and this list can go on. It is quite to find a replica of you in someone else and this can be a lot helpful in self-evaluation and development. One can find excellent leaders, planners, executives, lobbyists, and every possible combination of these! While meeting such a great variety of impressive people can be a little overwhelming, one thing should always be there in your mind: “sab ka baap hota hai” i.e. there will always be someone better than you and it is quite natural! This is what motivates us BITSians to strive for improvement at every stage!

So far so good. What about senior-junior interaction? On of the best! I could contact seniors for any kind of help at any time of day and they were always willing to help me. Be it academics, extracurriculars or anything else, they were always there to help me! There is just one catch: you can be frank with them but you have to respect for your seniors. After all they have gone through more than you can imagine. They deserve it for being a survivor. 😛

3. The Academics (ACADS):

Academic structure in BITS-Pilani is similar to most western colleges. The flexibility of making our own academic time-table is simply awesome. One thing peculiar to BITS Pilani is the system of ZERO ATTENDANCE. This means that even after skipping every lecture or tutorial, we are still eligible for appearing in evaluation components. But does this results in students inclining more towards missing the lectures as they don’t fear shortage of attendance? NO! There is always option to study from lecture powerpoint slides uploaded by Professors anytime and get our queries cleared during their free time. Thus bringing the education out of conventional classrooms to your personal computers. The time from skipping a lecture can be utilized for preparing for a test or pursuing some which interests you. The tests papers are set with high level of difficulty and simply can not neglect his/her acads completely, if he wishes to succeed in next 3-4 years. Thus right from beginning we are given FREEDOM, BUT WITH RESPONSIBILITY.

Library is well-equipped to satisfy any query arising in student mind and also start from scratch in entirely new field. e Books are download-able from your rooms through library website. So for geeks BITS-Pilani is equivalent to Wonderland for Alice or Chocolate Factory for Charlie. But then every now and then something like this can also happen:

4. Departments/Clubs/Fests:

Working in clubs or departments is a great way to meet batch-mates and seniors. One gets to learn so much from working for club/dept that it plays a major role in shaping your future. You get to meet people with similar fields of interest, learn a lot from seniors, make new friends, get to work in teams, and above all get the sense of responsibility. Witnessing fest in first year-first semester was amazing. BITS Open Sports Meet, the BOSM,  gave us a flavor of what OASIS is going to be. Oasis, O Oasis! What can I say about it. It was everything in itself. Photos, videos, sharing food which was meant to be shared, sharing food which was not meant to be shared, attending events, even late at night not wanting to sleep so that no events were missed – are common things that happen with everyone in Oasis.

These provided relief from inedible taste of mess food. ID cards can be used to pay in All Night Canteen (ANC). Thus you can spend as much you want, worrying only at the end of month when a staggering mess bill is at your disposal waiting to be paid. All that remains at that time is to take a failed pledge of  not spending so much next month. But if you have series of tests for which you have to pull an all-nighter, ANC visit with friends can be a brilliant way to refresh yourself. REDI(S) are there for every hostel and for ANC too. Hostel Redis are open till 7-7:30pm. They are major source of evening snacks and chai or shikanji or other beverages. They provide the national food for engineers: MAGGI! After a tough exam in the evening there nothing as refreshing as fried or plain maggi at your nearest redi!

6. DC++:
There are no malls or other cool place to hangout outside of campus or good movie theatres to watch a weekend movie of favourite genre. There comes DC++ to the rescue. It is something which has been keeping the students sane enough to function in this social desert and not turn crazy. With availability of latest movies, T.V. series, books, novels and what not, one can easily fall in love with it. It provides a platform for its user to share files over LAN network anytime of the day with an average file transfer speed of 8-9mbps! Fast indeed! Certainly with restricted internet access to some most viewed sites (if you know what I mean!) and ever-so-slow internet speeds, it all comes down to DC++ operators to download and share the content which matters. That being said, there are also tutorials for almost everything- be it app development, a new language (both computer and lingual), a new musical instrument, ebooks, video lectures etc. All of these can be downloaded free of cost (of course it is piracy!). It one of the things you will  definitely miss during holidays when you will be craving to watch that new released episode from your favorite TV series!

Indeed, BITS Pilani, Its Magic!

First Month in College

I am currently pursuing Mechanical Engineering from BITS Pilani and this how my first month was:

First Day

While entering through main gate, I could feel my nerves giving me a shiver. I was too excited and anxious about what would happen in next 4 years. I had some expectations. I was ready to face anything thrown at me with a brave heart. Apart from all that, one thing which I will never forget is the moment of crossing the main gate! It was so overwhelming that such a feeling can’t be put into words. After all the registration formalities were completed, we went for a campus tour. We were not able to cover the whole area, but still it was exhausting enough that I went to sleep at 7:00 PM!!

First Week

I would say it was horrible first week and I am sure that everyone had it the same way. Main reason: we did non-stop exploring! By the end of first week, we all had met our seniors, bought books from them, got wisdom and knowledge about general rituals and slang that need to be followed. Along with that, we started to get the hang of what was there for us in the bag for the current semester. I was busy in figuring out my daily routine (as if I were going to follow it, Pff!). Meeting new people, making new friends was definitely opening us up to the atmosphere of BITS Pilani.

First Month

At the end first month, I got settled in my groove. Just when I was about to assume that life was going to be easy on campus, the nukes were bombarded  in the form of tests, quizzes and assignments! Horror! But to my relief recreational activities like music nights, cultural association nights, friends, sports, etc. saved me from going into dark abyss of emptiness. Basically it kept me distracted from my spineless study! At the end of the first month I had a bunch of friends to hangout with and it was awesome to meet such different yet similar people! Pure fun!

My experience so far has taught me one thing very well:


This place has become a new home for me and without any hesitation I can claim:

 BITS Pilani, Its Magic!


Hello World!

Well its the first post, so I might be neglecting some of the etiquette. I am still working on it, don’t worry!. When I first thought about starting a blog, I wasn’t really excited by the idea of writing long articles in formal language. This changed last night when I did little bit of googling, YouTube video surfing  and read a few blogs. It became quite clear that it is not about composing formal articles always. It can be anything- a poem, a story, a tutorial, an article and so. The only necessity is that whatever it is, it has to be original, straight-from-heart and correct (to be interpreted as: “Making Sense”). It is a great medium through which you can let others take a glimpse from your perspective of things!

To sum up, through this blog, I will be sharing my experiences of my daily life. It might be people’s reaction (not in judgmental way), common observation of psychology, and other general thoughts and stories. Occasionally I might add something related to photography or Engineering, because lets face it: Math is cool and Photography is a satisfying experience.  Hope you all will enjoy reading it.

Will see you soon!!

Pro Tip: Always edit your blog before publishing it!